half a day
人生半日间
naguib mahfouz
i proceeded alongside my father, clutching his right hand, running to keep up with the long strides he was taking. all my clothes were new: the black shoes, the green school uniform, and the red tarboosh. my delight in my new clothes, however, was not altogether unmarred, for this was no feast day but the day on which i was to be cast into school for the first time.
my mother stood at the window watching our progress, and i would tu toward her from time to time, as though appealing for help. we walked along a street lined with gardens; on both sides were extensive fields planted with crops, prickly pears, henna trees, and a few date palms.
“why school?“ i challenged my father openly.“i shall never do anything to annoy you.“
“i'm not punishing you,“ he said, laughing.“school's not a punishment. it's the factory that makes useful men out of boys. don't you want to be like your father and brothers?“
i was not convinced. i did not believe there was really any good to be had in tearing me away from the intimacy of my home and throwing me into this building that stood at the end of the road like some huge, high-walled fortress, exceedingly stem and grim.
when we arrived at the gate we could see the courtyard, vast and crammed full of boys and girls.“go in by yourself,“ said my father,“and join them. put a smile on your face and be a good example to others.“
i hesitated and clung to his hand, but he gently pushed me from him.“be a man,“ he said.“today you truly begin life. you will find me waiting for you when it's time to leave.“
i took a few steps, then stopped and looked but saw nothing. then the faces of boys and girls came into view. i did not know a single one of them, and none of them knew me. i felt i was a stranger who had lost his way. but glances of curiosity were directed toward me, and one boy approached and asked,“who brought you?“
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